


From Within

by butterflyslinky



Category: The Hobbit - All Media Types
Genre: Angst, Canonical Character Death, Gen, Hobbitcon Fanbook Project
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-02-17
Updated: 2016-02-17
Packaged: 2018-05-21 06:51:25
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,346
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6042172
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/butterflyslinky/pseuds/butterflyslinky
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Strength does not come from his body.</p>
            </blockquote>





	From Within

**Author's Note:**

> My last piece for the Hobbitcon 4 Fanbook project. The prompt was Dori, Comfort vs. Strength, and I chose strength.

Strength was not the muscles in his arms.

Strength was carrying his baby brother out of the mountain, dragon fire licking at his back.

It was running down the slopes, his mother just behind, hoping they could reach the forest before they died.

It was wandering through the world, searching for a place to call their own, working and starving along the way.

It was finally settling in a mountain across Middle Earth and watching the third child be born in poverty.

It was picking up that baby as his mother lay dying, and swearing to protect him.

Strength did not come from his arms.

It came from his resilience.

*

Strength was not the broadness of his back.

Strength was teaching his brothers to read late at night, even though he was already tired from the day’s work.

It was tending to their wounds when they were hurt playing.

It was giving Ori another piece of bread he couldn’t afford, or passing his entire bowl to Nori with the claim that he wasn’t hungry anyway.

It was getting up before the sun to get to work, and going to bed well after the moon had risen to make sure his brothers were well.

Strength did not come from his back.

It came from his determination.

*

Strength was not the firmness of his hands.

Strength was begging Nori to come home and help him, not to get in trouble again.

It was fighting with his brother, saying that he wouldn’t accept him back anymore if he kept running away.

It was slamming the door after Nori had run off and swearing never to take him back.

It was telling the guards he had no idea where Nori had gone and that he wouldn’t tell them even if he did know.

It was opening the door when Nori knocked, meek and tired and swearing never to do it again.

It was recognizing the lie and trying to believe it.

It was embracing his brother and telling him it was the last time.

It was knowing that they were both lying.

Strength did not come from his hands.

It came from his loyalty.

*

Strength was not the length of his stride.

Strength was encouraging Ori to study.

It was scrounging money for books and paper, even if it meant not eating for a day or two.

It was coming home every day to ask Ori what he had accomplished and listening to the knowledge his baby brother had acquired.

It was asking questions to make sure Ori understood while not understanding anything himself.

It was making tea for Ori when he was tired but needed to stay up just a little longer.

It was finding Ori asleep on his desk and carrying him to bed late at night.

It was saving for years so that Ori could get an apprenticeship.

It was smiling and embracing his brother when he had become a master of his craft, and telling him that he would be a great scribe one day.

Strength did not come from the length of his stride.

It came from his pride.

*

Strength was not heading off to face a dragon.

Strength was telling his brother not to go.

It was fighting with his brothers late into the night, Ori saying he was old enough and deserved this chance and Nori saying it was the only way to regain his honor.

It was telling them that if they were going to die, he was going to die beside them.

It was packing everything they would need, checking every bag several times to make sure they hadn’t forgotten anything.

It was wrapping Ori up in jumpers and scarves to ensure he would not catch cold on the road and die of an illness before they even got to the dragon.

It was sharpening all of Nori’s blades for him while lecturing him on protecting Ori and ensuring that he wouldn’t be lost.

It was hearing Nori admit that he was afraid for them and embracing his brother for the first time in years.

Strength did not come from his courage.

It came from his fear.

*

Strength was not going into battle.

Strength was protecting his brother from the orcs and goblins and elves.

It was knocking down anything that dared to come near his family while he still drew breath.

It was lecturing the others about teasing Ori, princes and kings and guards alike.

It was defending Nori’s honor, even though Nori had long since given up on anyone believing he was truly reformed.

It was making sure everyone was safe and warm on the journey, even after they lost their supplies and were stranded in rain or in the forest or in Laketown.

It was charging into the fray with his brothers behind him, making sure that nothing would hurt them.

It was cleaning up the battlefield afterwards and embracing Nori and Ori and crying into their shoulders.

Strength did not come from fighting.

It came from regretting the need to do so.

*

Strength was not wealth.

Strength was knowing how to use it.

It was giving to anyone less fortunate than him, because he knew what it was like to give food portions to children and pretend he didn’t need them.

It was checking up on Ori every afternoon to make sure he had stopped working long enough to have lunch.

It was leaving notes and gifts for Nori, even if he rarely saw his brother anymore.

It was serving the King in any way he was asked, and helping any who needed his help.

It was opening his teashop again and laughing and talking with his customers.

Strength did not come from money.

It came from kindness.

*

Strength was not stopping Ori from going to Moria.

Strength was packing his bags.

It was giving Ori everything he might need on the journey and in the mines to survive and retake their oldest kingdom.

It was embracing him and telling him to write often and let him know when he might join him.

It was not telling Nori not to take risks.

It was telling Nori he loved him and to be careful.

It was giving his brother the support he needed and begging him not to squander it.

It was a dinner for all three of them the night before Ori left, the night before Nori vanished again, the three of them talking like they had never been apart.

It was hugging Ori so long he feared he would never be able to let go, but he did.

Strength did not come from protecting his brothers.

It came from letting them go.

*

Strength was not taking the news of his brothers’ deaths silently.

It was sobbing, loud and ugly and horrible to watch for everyone around him.

It was sitting alone in an empty house, unsure of who he was or what to do.

It was closing up his shop and retiring to a solitary life on his own, away from everyone else.

It was cursing the line of Durin and their recklessness that had gotten them and his brothers killed.

It was compulsively cleaning everything in sight and refusing to talk to anyone for weeks.

It was finally growing to accept what had happened and returning to life, a little slower, a little quieter.

It was the portraits on his mantelpiece, young and sweet and always with him.

Strength did not come from denial.

It came from his tears.

*

Strength was not lifting and carrying.

It was not a stiff upper lip in the face of adversity.

It was not bowling through every problem like it wasn’t there.

It was a warm fire, and strong tea. It was braiding his hair in the morning, and braiding his brothers’ hair until they could do it themselves.

It was love and books and arguments and hard work and late nights. It was jumpers and scarves and scolding and hugs.

It was love and family and determination.

Strength did not come from his body.

It came from within.

 


End file.
